Pregnancy Update

I've tried to write this blog many times this past week. It's hard to put all of these emotions into words. I haven't even shared this with all of my FF gals because to tell them makes it all real to me and I'm not sure I'm ready for that yet. To make a long story short my visit to the Cardiologist was not good. I received no good news and again left the doctor in tears. I will be monitored every two weeks with cardio visits and if needed a halter monitor if there is any change. I go on Wednesday to have one put on and will have to wear it this time for only 24 hours!!! I hate those things and am glad to only have to put up with it for a day. My spirits are low and I have been struggling for the past few days. I'm not sure how much is just preggo hormones and how much is caused by the new meds. The meds are helping but will have to be increased regularly as the baby continues to grow and put more stress on my heart. The good news is that I have hope and I know that my heavenly Father is really in control. He will not and has not given me anything more than I can handle.

A second thing that has been going on and I feel the need to share are the comments I have been getting from the doctors and people around me. These comments have all centered along the lines that I terminate this pregnancy. Let me tell you all now in case any of you are feeling the need to share the same with me. IT IS NOT AN OPTION. I have been blessed with this new life and it is A LIFE! I will not even give the thought consideration. Shame on those of you (and you know who you are) who have had the audacity to even speak the words to me. It was not in my hands to become pregnant and it is not in my hands what happens. Despite what many of you think it is all up to the Lord. His will is to be done...not mine or what you think it should be. All of this and all of the uncertainty is to Glorify Him. I'm not sure how it will all work out, but I do know that it will all be used to Glorify my Savior and for me that is all I need to know.

I have my appointment with the high risk OB on Wednesday and will hopefully have some fun new baby news to share. We will get to have an ultrasound and I can't wait to see the little bean!